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Comments for 'The Legend of Kazak'-Dun (a history of the Elites)'



master_stu
7:18 am | January 5, 2003
well this is looking very good. don't listen to any neg. comments, they are all jealous
Knightmare(MM
10:14 am | January 4, 2003
Yeah, you tell 'em!
Kane172
3:56 am | January 4, 2003
sephiroth is total and complete ripoff of final fantasy
Sephiroth
12:45 pm | January 3, 2003
Kazak'-Dun is a total and complete ripoff from Khazad-Dum, the dwarf realm in Lord of the Rings.
Knightmare(MM
5:42 am | January 3, 2003
Pssh. Quiet seph, you didn't do that with wado's thing, which could but was not called a ripoff of Barad-dur...
Kane 172
1:03 am | January 3, 2003
I've never read The Lord of the Rings
Kane 172
11:15 pm | January 2, 2003
thanks for the advice, had so many ideas tried to cram a few too many into the first chapter but in the next few entries you'll streighten all the weird words out.
Knightmare(MM
10:07 pm | January 2, 2003
I concur with Sarge on this one, you did a nice job. Though perhaps you might introduce the names of species a bit slower, they tend to get lost in the reader's mind.

As for the length, you did a nice job with that, I really liked this read. Might have put a bit more detail into the writing itself, and lengthened the intro a bit, because the actual format reminded me of a movie script.. not something you want to read often.

One last thing: KAAAAAAAAAANE!!! BWWAWAAAHH!!!
;- )
gruntkiller
8:28 pm | January 2, 2003
wow you took on a very hard topic with this story and so far you've pulled it off almost perfectly.

i say almost because i personaly think it could benifit greatly from a bit more detail
Anonymous
5:05 pm | January 2, 2003
a master piece
Sarge
2:28 pm | January 2, 2003
Wow their was a lot of work in this story and it is apparent but I get lost with all the matchokos and ktachos and cho kais everything. I had to copy and paste all the phrases and then print them out for a quick refrence sheet.

Very good for a beginning of a story and perhaps a first post not sure, Methinks m'lord's story will prosper if he keeps at it. Good job.


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