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Comments for 'Earth under siege' |
?????
12:07 am | April 29, 2004
the part that says,"lets kick some covenant butt out oh here" should be "lets kick some covenant ass out here!"
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Chief17
8:58 pm | April 22, 2004
Lets hope part 2 is better.:)
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CoLd BlooDed
12:02 am | April 22, 2004
Erm... don't know what to say really, besides suggesting for you to use the code, check your grammar, spelling, punctuation, etc.
Otherwise, pretty bad. Sorry. Was it your first time writing EVER? Or is this your first fan fiction? Because I can forgive you if it's your first time writing... and if your younger than most. :)
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BlackGhost
8:09 pm | April 21, 2004
It's alright. First of all, everything goes WAY too fast. Be sure to get some detail in there (i.e what the characters are like, the setting, etc.) Then make sure you have an interesting plot and use spell check so people don't get turned away by looking at all those awful spelling errors.
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Chief17
8:04 pm | April 21, 2004
It was my first time.:(
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Hikaru-119
10:55 am | April 21, 2004
Those are two really big paragraphs.
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Tazz
10:53 am | April 21, 2004
That was a great story - for a three-year old who likes writing bullshit.
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romac1991
8:31 am | April 21, 2004
horrible grammar!
1/10
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