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Comments for 'Survival, Chapter Eight'



Agent Shade
7:06 pm | October 9, 2003
hmmm...yes, the idea of having someone's brain ripped out is kind of corny indeed, however, you could see that the flood being that inserted itself into Savard's skull became his brain...yes, seems very farfetched, but nevertheless, possible, thanks
FOrunnER
11:44 am | October 9, 2003
Ditto Alpha, but I didn't like the whole thing when he took out his brain and he was still alive. No offense, but it seemed kinda corny. Other than that,keep it up 8.5/10
Alpha Lance
11:20 am | October 9, 2003
Nice going on the kick A story. I also like the part where that Flood was talking to the captain, than all of the sudden he attacks him. Brillint. Also, could you please indent next time. The reason I want you to indent so it will look more neater and cleaner, it just make the story look better. But still, you got one of a kind story going here, and I also wait anxiously to see what happens next.

-Alpha Lance
Steve Ollett
8:04 am | October 9, 2003
Good stuff, your writing is very descriptive and the dialogue flows nicely as you develop your story.

One criticism though; the part where Captain Savard has his brain ripped out by the Flood - Is it really possible that he would still be aware of his surroundings if his brain was in effect disconnected from all of his sensory organs, ears, eyes, etc.?

Other than that, I look forward to the next chapter.
Sergeant B
8:15 pm | October 8, 2003
Where the hell is everyone in this world? Like only the agent guy is here!! Well, pretty good Shade. But you don't have to keep writing new paragraphes over and over......
Agent Shade
8:11 pm | October 8, 2003
hey guys, i've started a new series called "MJOLNIR" but i've changed my display name to Nemesis, so when the fan fiction is updated again, go read this new one and see what you think. i will continue to write about this one as well


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