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Comments for 'The Life of a Marine: part 1' |
russ687
11:02 am | June 2, 2004
Not too bad, but I think the story lacked any significant punch to make the reader read your next part in the series. Somehow, make the ending leave the reader in a suspence that makes them want to read the next part. This story lacked that special "punch" that would make me want to read a second part to it. Even if this is your "opener" to your series, it still has to contain something for the reader to digest if you want them to come back.
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