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Comments for 'The Last Battle: The Yaxans'



Wado
4:09 am | December 20, 2003
Well Sergeant B you can correct my grammar while I run for cover and grab a nuke-firing rocket launcher. The Yaxan are coming!

Better?
Sergeant B
8:33 pm | December 18, 2003
Wado, it's actually Yaxan, one cap, four regulars. I was just...exagerating Yaxan...
Wado
6:15 am | December 18, 2003
Yeah YAXAN is a great name Sergeant B.

and as for this chapter, wow, it did turn out good. Kudos to Frensa Geran the author.

I like how the story ended up in a hospital. Many stories have the main characters going someplace and finding trouble, but great stories often have the trouble come find the main characters.

Mystery, a cliff-hanger ending, and plenty of room for speculation. Very Bungie like I would say.
Sergeant B
1:59 am | December 18, 2003
I made up the name YAXAN!
Elfster
1:30 am | December 18, 2003
Ok this is just sad. A bad start and when a great chapter comes out, nobody reads it.

Theres only a few things i found bad about it.

I think one of the Elites actually called the Humans Humans, which doesn't normally happen from what I've seen. They can humans infidels, primates, things like that, but never by their own name.

Also, from the sound of it, it seems like the Elite that had his arm cut off would have known his name was Master Chief instead of Chief but theres no way to know from that.

And why would Brian have a gun? He's an archeoligist (or however its spelled) Not a Marine.

Also, Mars is so close to Earth, that with the Covenant's percision with Slipspace and inter-system Slipspace jumps they would have no reason to fight it at all.

Otherwise, nice story


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