halo.bungie.org

They're Random, Baby!

Fan Fiction


Comments for 'The Lost Platoon- Chapter 2- New Breed'



Helljumper
12:01 am | November 30, -0001
Is this your first post, I tried to do a search for Chapter 1 and under your name but it came up blank. I feel like i need background info.

ODST
Helljumper
12:01 am | November 30, -0001
Ignore that last post. The writing is a lot better in this story. I didn't read all of it cause i got bored. Sorry.

ODST
Mastergrunt
12:01 am | November 30, -0001
Kinda confusing with the corporals and all
MC's Cousin
12:01 am | November 30, -0001
The writing isn't totally bad. But you do have PLENTY of grammatical and spelling errors. Plus, you didn't use the code. Why?????!!!!!
I would suggest that you type up all of your stories in MS Word or Corel, or some kind of Word Processing program. Then paste it into the submissions form. By the way, when you type it up on your comp, you might as well include the code; so you don't "forget."

Signing Off


MCC
yeti
12:01 am | November 30, -0001
while better than the first, it still sucked to hell. the events were random, the charachters were flimsy and stupid, the story bad and random, and you suck.
Jessica
12:01 am | November 30, -0001
1) Kinda Confusing
2) More Character Development
3) GRAMMAR!!
4) Booooring!!
5) Detail...
6) Explain why happened...

Well, those are things that i found you need to work on...that wans't intended to be rude, just some constructive critism...

Jess


bungie.org
brr!